Personal discipleship – part 1

Posted by Josh Howerton on Jun 27, 2010 | 1 comment

Really great day today in our worship gathering.  Our elders have been praying for a culture of personal discipleship to take root within The Bridge for a few months so we took this morning to look at the Biblical concept of discipleship… and our need for it.  Following up today’s sermon I’m going to write a short series of blog posts this week for people who are thinking about initiating a discipleship relationship with another Christian.

Part 1 – Initiating discipleship

This can be the most awkward and hardest part of the whole process.  If you’re thinking about approaching a more mature Christian for discipleship questions like “Are they too busy?”, “Is this going to weird them out?”, “What if they say no?” and thoughts like “They’re not going to want to spend time with ME!” are going through your head.  On the other hand if there’s a younger Christian in your small group that God is putting on your heart to invest in, you’re asking “Do they think I’m mature enough?”, “Do they respect me enough?”, “Are they going to be offended that I think they need my help?”.

A few tips for people who want to approach a more mature Christian for discipleship…

• JUST ASK!  The very worst thing that could happen is that they say “no” and now know that you respect them.
• Give them an “easy out” when you ask.  Say something like, “Hey Becky, I know you’re so busy with your life and kids so it’s completely OK if you don’t have time right now, but would you consider discipling me?“
• Give them some time to think about an answer rather than asking for an on-the-spot answer.  A discipleship relationship is a big commitment that they deserve time to consider.
• Don’t be mad or offended if they say “no”.  Many mature Christians are heavily invested in ministry with people already.  If they say they can’t right now, thank them for considering it and understand that they’re not spiritually obligated to say “yes” to you.
• Be willing to conform to their schedule rather than making them conform to yours.
• Be committed.  Don’t approach someone for discipleship and then end up calling them every other week to tell them you’re too busy this week.  In a word, that’s “lame”.
• If there’s no one in your life right now that seems right for this kind of relationship, pray and pursue time with people who may fit the mold.  Don’t freak out!

A few tips for Christians who want to begin investing in the life of a younger Christian…

• Because of pride in their lives, a younger Christian may be offended that you think you’re spiritually “older” than them.  You may run someone off if you start by asking if you can mentor them.  Instead, you may test the waters of their receptiveness to you by asking if they want to read a book together or start meeting every week to talk about their walk with Christ.  Especially if they’ve confided in you about a struggle or problem, you may ask to meet weekly to discuss a Biblically-solid Christian book about that subject.
• Look for someone who respects and likes you.  Discipleship happens best in the context of relationship.
• Be committed.  Consistency builds both respect and trust.  Inconsistency destroys both.